Advice for a good marriage can in some cases seem a little obvious, but in a lot of cases it can seem like just the advice you need. When you are involved in a long term relationship, sometimes
it's hard to see the wood for the trees, and it takes only the most basic advice for us to see what is wrong. Check this article out for more information.
Advice for a good marriage 1
The best piece of advice is to be honest with yourself about when it is and isn't working. If you kid yourself that everything is fine when it isn't, things are hardly likely to get better-in
fact you will usually notice things getting steadily worse. The sooner you spot and admit to problems, the sooner you can move past them. Half the work is done as soon as you admit something is
wrong, so don't be afraid..
Advice for a good marriage 2
Learn to communicate effectively. Too often relationships degenerate into accusations and fighting as the default method of interaction. Can you honestly hope for things to last if that's how you
both behave? If you have something under your skin, sit down and talk it out. Talking about things sensibly rarely makes things worse-unlike accusations and arguing!
Advice for a good marriage 3
Understand that you can't fix the problems in your marriage solely fixing your partner's behaviour. A marriage is exactly that-the joining of two people-so it's not healthy to make one person do
all the changing and adapting. This will not lead to a healthy relationship. It's much better to sit and talk it out and then work out how you can both make things better for each other. It's
also a lot easier this way, as each of you will usually only need to make small adjustments to keep the other happy.
Advice for a good marriage 4
Learn the difference between being in love and falling in love. When you fall in love, the person can do no wrong and people are able to behave in ways that their partner may not necessarily
agree with in a normal state of mind. That's why it can take work to stay in love-the love is still there, but you can't expect to act however you please and for it to still be there. Love is
like a fire, it sometimes needs to be tended to make sure it still burns.
Advice for a good marriage 5
Understand the principles of marriage karma-you get what you give, so if you go the extra yard for your partner and prove yourself to be kind, caring and considerate, the chances are they will
act a lot more like that toward you too. Think about when you see couples that are really in love-it's rarely just one of them doing the kind things is it?
Hopefully this advice for a good marriage will help you out. Check out the links below for some great information on fixing your marriage for good.
I was speaking with a group of friends about relationships one day and decided to ask them about the things that both sexes do that are loved or hated by the other.
This is a compilation of the things they said...
1 - Move the boundaries
When you make an agreement, women often either don't stick to them or say that they feel differently about the situation and they want to renegotiate.
2 - They generally do not express what is on their minds unless prompted.
Why can't she just say she's sad when she is and say she has issues with some thing when she does.
3 - They generally understand guys but disagree with the way that they are so either try to change them or just do not accommodate them.
4 - Comparing their mate to another man in an unfavourable light. The only time it may work is if the man being used for comparison is a role model to their mate.
5 - Wanting to turn the man into a lady by demanding certain kinds of actions. He is not a woman!
6 - Demeaning his interests and hobbies
Some ladies belittle their husbands interests and actively try to wean them from them (for instance football), while simultaneously trying to get the man to take a deep interest in their hobbies
and also participate.
The end message that is often communicated is "I don't care about your interests but you had better care about mine if you love
me".
7 - Slob culture from the lady - just generally unclean or untidy. Most men like a woman who can manage her environment.
8 - Discussing the man with her friends.
9 - Nagging.
10 - Listening with a vacant shut-up-so-I-can-talk-too expression.
Many men are put off by a girl who carries that kind of expression while they are talking. Men do not always share their feelings in the way that ladies expect, so when he talks about something
that is important to him and she interrupts to raise a subject that is not relevant to the matter at hand, it may generate cracks.
11 - A lady not recognising that in a conversation, men are solution oriented rather than conversation oriented.
Don't get irritated because he doesn't want a 3-hour talk when he can see a quick solution.
12 - Spend all day looking in the mirror - and still not look any different!
13 - Getting paranoid about the way they look
If he didn't like the way she looks, he wouldn't be with her.
14 - Insecurity when out together
Men don't like women saying things like "you fancy her" and "she's far better looking than me". Stop saying it. It irritates them to bits.
Ladies are we really committing these relationship no-nos and driving our men bonkers? If you find yourself doing any of the things above, give yourself a smart rap on the knuckles. Hopefully the
pain will bring you back to order.
Reforming relationships with ex partners is a tricky process, so before you go any further take a moment to think to yourself about what went wrong the first time around, and why this time is
going to be any different. It may well be that you are focusing on the positives in the relationship because of your needs, and that is causing you to forget the negatives. Or it may well be that
you thought everything was great, but it wasn’t working so well for your ex-wife or ex-girlfriend. Either way you need to look at the relationship and work out what went wrong, and work out if it
is something that you can fix. If you don’t do this then you are setting off down the same path to a break up once again.
Now there’s two possible situations that ended your relationship last time. Either you called it off or she did. The third option “the mutual decision” is a virtual non existent situation. One
partner will always initiate the ‘break up talk’. It’s practically unheard of that two people at exactly the same instant switch from being happy with each other to wanting to end a relationship
- unless they just found out they are twins separated at birth, and if that’s the case you probably shouldn’t be putting too much thought into getting back together! How you get back together is
going to depend a lot on how you broke up.
If you were the one to call it off, then you are going to have to be very careful about the way you re-approach her. She was most likely very hurt after your relationship ended, so asking her to
put herself in that position again is going to be difficult. A girl is going to translate your actions as “I thought I could do better, turns out I can’t, so I guess you’ll do”. That’s not going
to work a lot of the time.
If you were the one that called it off, then getting things going again is going to involve some pride swallowing on your part. You need to admit that you were wrong to call it off in the first
place. A good way of doing this is to say something along the lines of “You know, I really miss the (insert something she likes here) we used to do.” Depending on her response you have your
opening for a new ‘first’ date.
On the other hand, if she was the one that called things off you need to approach things differently. There was something about you, or about the situation, that didn’t make her happy. All you
need to do is figure out what that was and change it, and you are half way to winning her back. From there you need her to become aware of the changed situation, re-establish contact, show her
how things will be different and then convince her that getting back together is the best thing for both of you.
It is not easy to have a difficult marriage. And it becomes more difficult that you do not want to show the world that your marriage is not a healthy one. You try to avoid sharing this situation
to your friends and family. All you want is people see your marriage as a great one. No fight, no conflict, everything is fine.
You, and hopefully your partner, still want this marriage to last. You just don’t know how to deal with it. Handling all the conflicts between the two of you is not something you master. You need
somebody to help you both. To solve this catastrophe in your family.
You must get help. And let’s stop thinking about ‘divorce’. Not even saying it.
Get the secrets to help you solve your problem. Check them out below:
1. Get a Marriage Counseling
Getting a marriage counselor is often the best way to help the crisis in your marriage. It is even better if you get one as a part of your marriage maintenance plan. Marriages have a better
opportunity to success when the couple goes to marriage counseling. A counselor can really make a difference in the worst situation. He or she helps you to understand your partner better because
he or she has no biased opinion.
So, why not find one now? Go to local churches as many of them will offer this service for free. Or, find it online or in the local yellow pages.
A good marriage counselor can make a difference between getting separated, divorced or staying together, no matter how big your marriage problem is. Some of the things that you can work through
with the help of a counselor are:
• Work on marriage maintenance from the start
• Help you admit defeat every now and then (though you’re right, it’s unwise to end a marriage over a disagreement)
• Make passion a top priority in your marriage
3. What You Can Expect from a Marriage Counselor
A marriage counselor will take you to a few sessions of therapy to work out problems in your relationship. This therapy often begins as the couple analyzes the good and bad aspects of the
relationship, then help you learn to change how you and your partner interact with each other to solve the problems. Why? Because both of you have
contributions to whatever that comes in the relationship.
4. How Much Will a Marriage Counselor Cost?
The average cost for marriage and family counseling is around $100 per session. Not to mention that you need to pay for the initial fee, which is about $40. However, if you are unable to pay for
it, you can also find non-profit organizations for a free service. You can also ask your company if it offers free counseling for its employees and families. Go find a counselor. No matter how
much it costs, as long as your marriage is saved, it’s worth it.
5. Counseling for the Entire Family
It is normal to have conflicts within the family. However, when normal conflicts turn into so much worse, it’s big chance that family members begin to hurt each other emotionally. Thus seeking
counseling for everyone is a good idea. It will try to help them learn how to reduce the problems. Families can learn how to effectively deal
with problems by getting a family counselor.
In the middle of a session the other day I had a powerful realization. I was asked to think of a relationship I had with something in the last week that in my mind was the ideal relationship, and
to think of what it was about that relationship that made it ideal.
A number of people in the group thought of their cars, tool sheds, families, workmates, old friends, even relationships with objects such as their television remote, recliner chair, diamond
jewellery or favorite pair of shoes. To each of these people, these things felt comfortable, and simple. The relationships they had with these people or objects was rewarding and easy to
maintain.
To make your marriage more rewarding, cast a look over at here:
When my turn came to identify my ideal relationship, I thought of my dog. My dog has very simple needs, and it is the ultimate ego-boost for me when I get home at night and I am greeted in such
an enthusiastic fashion. I don’t know of any others that greet me so enthusiastically night after night. No matter how long I have been away from the house or no matter how my day has been. I
call this unconditional love.
So what is unconditional love?
Unconditional love is the type of love that comes without conditions. It is the type of love that you have for your partner when the romantic, hollywood-style love is gone. Once the romantic love
is gone you make the transition to "real" love. Real love is love you have for your partner despite the knowledge that they are not perfect. You know your partner has faults. You know your
partner is not perfect. You know your partner makes mistakes sometimes, but that’s okay. You still love them. This is unconditional love.
The same thing applies to you however in looking at your partner’s faults. You acknowledge that you are the same. You have faults. You are not perfect. You know you make mistakes sometimes, but
that’s okay. That’s called self-acceptance, and you expect unconditional love to overcome the faults and imperfections that people have.
So what do you get from this then? Should we all go out and get dogs to teach us something about unconditional love? Maybe there is a lesson to be learnt here. We all clutter our lives with
trials and tribulations, and there is the temptation to let our issues rule our lives.
But if you are serious about saving your marriage you need to put the clutter to one side and let your unconditional love come through. It is okay
to have faults and make mistakes. And love will conquer them all.
Have a think about unconditional love and how you can apply this realization to your relationship.
How to Attract Women: How to Impress Women by James, Relationship Expert
Renee Grant-Williams, a celebrity vocal coach, says, "The people we deal with in life come to know us by the three ways in which we present ourselves: (a) how we look; (b) what we say; and (c)
how we say it." Obviously, this applies just as much to women as it does to men. If not more.
So if you want to impress women, you're gonna have to carefully think about how you present yourself. Let's look at each category.
A. How We Look
Whether you like it or not, dress is crucial. It says a lot about you: whether you care about how you look, or you don't. But you don't have to dress like a Hollywood celebrity to look good.
1. Get a female friend or sister to help you pick your clothes.
If you don't know what to wear, get someone who does know! Ask a female friend or acquaintance to go shopping with you. She's sure to be flattered, and if you reward her with a gift certificate
or DVD, she'll be all the more motivated to help you out.
2. Check out the latest styles.
Go to the bar or club and see what others are wearing. Observe what the guys who do well with women wear. Look in magazines and catalogues and see what it's in style.
3. Wear what conforms to your identity.
Hey, if you're the hardworking, businessman type, wear formal clothes that accent your career. If you're the snowboarder/skater type, wear grungy clothes that accent your loose, laid-back
persona. And if you're really into music, don't be afraid to express yourself with the types of clothes that rock stars and musicians like to wear! You can't force a style upon yourself; clothes
are a form of marketing, so market yourself like you would a product, in the way that best shows what you're all about.
The same goes for your hair: If you want to convey a clean-cut, crisp image, then you might want to shave and cut your hair short. But if you're trying to convey a rebel image, a goatee, long
hair, and tattoos are probably in order.
And speaking of tattoos, don't forget that they are an ACCESSORY that further helps you to market yourself. Tats, jewelry, and even hats are great ways to mold your image to the man you want to
present to women. If you're a snowboarder, for example, a wool hat says "Cool". Or if you're an aspiring rapper or musician, a doo rag has a place in your wardrobe. Consider the accessories that
best conform to you as a person.
* Your dreams.
Let a girl know that you have a purpose and direction in your life, that you're not a wandering bum!
* Funny stories.
Humor is a great aphrodisiac. Think about some funny things that have happened in your life. But make sure your delivery is good--more below.
* Her.
The Dalai Lama said, “Sometimes one creates a dynamic impression by saying something, and sometimes one creates as significant an impression by remaining silent.” Don't be afraid to let a girl
speak for a while. Be silent, but be interested. Actively listen to what she says. It'll go a long way towards upping the attraction meter!
* Teasing/Playing around.
This is a great technique, especially if you don't know exactly what to talk about. Throw in an occasional joke or funny moment. I have a friend who has a great technique for handling silence. He
laughs to himself, prompting the girl to ask, "What?" He'd say in a sly way that would invite curiosity, "Nah, you don't want to know. I'm in deep thought." She'd respond, "Tell me! Tell me!" So
he'd do the whole Meow Mix song ("Meow meow meow meow..."). It's just one of many great ways to lighten the moment, and show you're a relaxed, none-too-serious person.
* Last but not least, sex.
One relationship guru brilliantly says, “TALKING about sex is the first step towards having it.” Ask her if she’s a bad girl, or what’s the craziest thing she’s ever done in her life—with a bit
of innuendo added into your voice. This isn't the kind of stuff you want to talk about right away, but when things are going good, it's great to show your "inner bad boy". She’ll know what you
mean, and get excited thinking about it.
Likewise, here are some topics that you SHOULD NOT talk about:
- Offensive humor. Chris Rock's racial humor may be entertaining, but it's not a good topic for a first date!
- Politics. There's nothing to be gained by arguing over issues and parties.
- Past girlfriends. An absolute no-no. All you do is play a game that makes one of you jealous or suspicious of the other. Stay away from this topic, but if she DOES ask you about past
girlfriends, talk respectfully about them so you don't come off as an insecure whiner.
- Inside jokes between you and your friends. They're called inside jokes for a reason--keep them that way!
- Anything that could be interpreted as geeky or dorky, such as science-fiction. Unless you know for a fact that she's into science fiction and comic books, keep it to yourself for now.
The last thing you want to come across as is a geek!
- Too much about yourself, your possessions, how great you are, etc. Bragging only makes you look insecure. Even if you own a yacht, don't talk about it like it makes you any more
special than her.
C. How We Say It
Of course, none of these topics, particularly funny stories, are gonna work if you don't know to deliver them. Delivery in speech is crucial. People who have good delivery can make an otherwise
dull story an exciting one. I highly suggest you read "Voice Power" by the aforementioned Renee grant Williams. Here are some tips she recommends:
1. Use consonants.
That is, accent your speech. If you're talking about a great concert you went to, no one will believe it's that great if you say in a monotone voice, "That was a great concert." That puts people
to sleep. Instead, say, "Man, that was a grrrreat concert!" The Tony the Tiger voice. If she says something, don't say as if you're bored, "Really." Say, "Rrrreally?", then, with emphasis, "WOW."
It works!
2. Don't use unnecessary words and details.
If you're talking about a time when you and your friends went to Cancun, don't bother with the unnecessary details like the food they served on the plane, the wait for the taxi, or the sheets
they used in the hotel. Get to the point!
3. Silence.
As Williams says, Silence does speak a thousand words. There's nothing better than the "power pause", especially when trying to captivate your listeners with a story of bravery. You can lead up
to something powerful, then pause while the girl takes it in and after a few seconds of silence, say, "But that's not all..." Or
4. Drama and comedy.
Don't be afraid to sprinkle some dramatic and comedic flair into your speech. If you're talking about a goofy incident with your buddy, laugh along with it. When you laugh, it's a cue for other
people to laugh. Chris Rock does this all the time; he laughs at his own scripts, and it has the power of making his routine all the funnier. Likewise, if you're telling a dramatic story of
something amazing like rescuing people from a car accident, talk with conviction and suspense. It really goes a long way towards spellbinding women; they love a great story, especially a heroic
one.
5. Use body language.
It's not enough to talk with your arms beside your side and your butt on your seat. Talk with your arms, with your hands, your body language creating a sense of excitement. It's a fact:
enthusiasm is contagious. So show some enthusiasm with your vocal and body languages!
Finally, change your pitch. If things are going well, lower your pitch, give her your best Barry White. If you're talking about a funny moment, a louder, more excited pitch is probably
best. Recognize the mood and alter your voice to conform to it.
Congratulations! You're on your way to making great impressions on great women. Recognize the power of speech and appearance, and you're bound to succeed.
Don't forget, if you want to learn more about making yourself unforgettable to women by making unforgettable impressions, visit my website at "How to Be Irresistible to Women."
A Terrible Mistake That's Keeping You From Success With Women by Joseph Matthews
Lately, I've been having a great time. It can be easy to get so worked up over normal, every day things -- like work, school, relationships, etc. -- that it's nice to every once and a while take
a step back and unwind.
That's what I've been doing lately.
And it's been a great reminder to me that we shouldn't be taking life so seriously all the time.
In fact, being able to kick back like this is a key factor in being successful in life -- AND with women!
Allow me to explain.
Fun is an important factor in being successful. You have to actually ENJOY the journey you're taking if you want to achieve your goals in life.
For instance, if you want to be a pro golfer, but you HATE golfing, do you think you're going to stick to your goal? Or will you look for something more satisfying for you?
I'm willing to bet the answer to that is YES.
The same is true of meeting women.
If you want to have a beautiful girlfriend/wife/whatever, but you HATE the process of meeting women, are you really going to end up getting what you want?
I'm willing to bet the answer to that is NO.
I get emails on a daily basis from guys lamenting about how much they want to have a wonderful woman in their lives, but they always add to that "But I hate going to bars, clubs, bookstores, gas
stations, public places, anywhere with actual living humans, etc. What can I do?"
I think some guys would just prefer to sit at home and look at naughty pictures of women on the internet than actually go out and meet real girls.
This is because they don't know how to make meeting women FUN.
And let's face it, if this is a chore, then you're not going to want to do it, right?
So let's role up our sleeves and get our hands dirty, because I want to tell you how to make meeting women something you actually can ENJOY doing as opposed to making it something you HATE doing
and are reluctant to pursue.
The first thing I want you to think about is what kind of a woman it is that you want. What does she like? What is she interested in? What does she look like? The more you know about the woman
you want, the easier it will be to filter out all the girls you DON'T want.
Remember, the narrower your search, the more happy you'll be with the results you get.
The second thing I want you to think about is where you can meet the kind of woman you want. Make a list of all the places you can think of where a woman who's interested in the kind of things
you want her to be would go.
For instance, let's say you want a girl who loves baseball. Where would girls who love baseball go? Just off the top of my head, here's a list:
1. Major League Baseball Games
2. Minor League Baseball Games
3. Little League Baseball Games
4. Sports Bars On Game Day
5. Sporting Goods Stores
6. Baseball Conventions
The list could go on, but you get the idea. So if you love baseball, and you want a woman who loves baseball -- GO TO A BASEBALL GAME! And while you're there, meet the women who are there too!
Use the other qualities you're looking for in a girl to pick and choose which women you want to meet.
At the very least, you're doing something you enjoy anyway, so you're going to have fun no matter what!
But if you're still wondering what to do once you actually have to MEET a woman, you need to check out my book The Art Of Approaching.
In it, I'll take you step-by-step through the process of how to meet the women you want, quickly and easily, with no fear of rejection or failure. If you haven't already gotten my book and read
it cover-to-cover, you owe it to yourself to do so now:
Surviving a breakup is reminiscent to mourning the loss of a loved one. You have devoted your time, energy and effort to the idea that the
relationship would succeed. It is essential to remember that it is only this relationship you mourn not a total and not the total loss of your hopes and dreams. Your life will go on, just down a
new path. You do not have to proceed blindly; there are 5 steps to a breakup that you can anticipate.
Stage 1:
The first step is usually denial. You can not believe that the relationship has ended. You are left asking how all of your efforts could amount to nothing. You must remind yourself in this step
that sometimes a breakup, no matter how difficult, is really the best outcome.
Try to separate yourself from the emotional aspects and look at the relationship objectively. You will likely be able to accurately identify the fatal flaws in the relationship.
Stage 2:
Once the denial fades, likely it will be replaced with anger. This anger can be directed towards yourself, your ex or even the universe in general.. No matter whom you hold responsible, trust
that there is no single culprit and angry accusations do not solve any problems. It is best to move forward as soon as possible.
Stage 3:
As you work past the anger and hurt associated with the ending of a relationship, you will likely to find yourself falling in love again. It is human nature to suppress the hurtful memories and
let the joyful times overshadow the problems of the past. The danger associated is that if you try to rekindle your relationship without facing the root problems, then you will likely find
yourself in this situation once more.
Stage 4:
True sadness for the loss of your hopes for this relationship will follow. You will mourn what has been as well as what could have been. You may even feel regret for the portion of your life,
months or years, that you have dedicated to this relationship.
Try to remind yourself that although things did not work out the way you expected you can always learn and grow from each new experience in life. Use this encounter as a stepping stone for
personal growth.
Stage 5:
Finally you will arrive on the other side of this breakup at acceptance. Hopefully you will have become a better person for having gone through this journey. Acceptance will allow you to collect
the knowledge and self-discovery from this relationship and venture out towards the next relationship, hopefully with better success.
My number one job with couples is helping them find the motivation to really go to work on their relationships. Once I find the key to
what invigorates them and makes them want to grow the rest is easy! Here's 9 reasons that spur many people on.
Affairs Hurt People
Most of us know someone who's been hurt by an affair. It might have been you. Think of one such instance.
Remind yourself of the pain it caused everyone: the betrayal, the emptiness, the lost opportunities; children that are heartbroken with delayed emotional development; partners feeling rejected
and betrayed, and wondering what's wrong with them.
And, of course, there are those who did the betraying and now feel guilty and ashamed, and they can't believe the harm they've done. They, too, may wonder what is wrong with them, that they could
have hurt so many.
Remind yourself of all the pain and know that it could happen to you. So, do your homework and make your relationship work now!
What You'll Wish You Had Done
Imagine yourself at age 70, 80, or 90 looking back at what you accomplished in life. Do you wish you had spent more time on the little things of life like washing dishes, watching TV, working two
jobs, or cutting out coupons?
Or, will you wish you had spent more time with the family? Will you wish you had had that special time every single day with your spouse?
I know my answer. I've seen too many people regret the lost time with loved ones. Do it now! Make choices to create this relationship time in your life.
What Are You Modeling For Your Kids?
Are you modeling full, vibrant adult relationships where partners are open, honest and truly desire to spend time together? If what you are modeling now is what your kids have later in their
adult relationships, is that what you desire for them? What could be better?
Some of the First Feelings Are Still There!
Remember the excitement and wonder of first love with your partner. Feel what it was like to wonder at how extraordinary that person was, and how incredible it was that he or she cared about
you.
Those feelings are still there, but you're missing out on them. What a waste! Recapture them!
Know That We Are All At Risk
Be aware of divorce statistics. Where I live the divorce rate is almost 70%. The odds are against you. Get to work!
If your present relationship started with an affair realize that 75% of such marriages end in divorce. Get busy on your relationship!
The Number One Best Gift You Can Give Your Children is a Good Marriage
Children thrive when they know their parents love one another deeply. The best way to have a secure child is for mom and dad to have a secure relationship. It's as though children are emotional
sponges. They soak up everything going on in your relationship. The number one best gift you can give your children is a good marriage.
Our Enemies Are Legion!
Realize that the enemies of relationships are: unawareness, ignorance, apathy, uncontrolled emotional reactivity, overfocus on "important" things like children or jobs, avoidant behavior like
addictions or compulsions, and a host of other distractions that consume our time, energy and emotional attention.
Developing an emotionally fulfilling, vibrant relationship isn't as hard as you may think. All it really takes is the time, commitment to engage, and perhaps a couples counselor..
You can educate yourself. You can find the time. You can change your behavior and even your attitudes. And so can your partner.
It is the most important thing you will ever do.
SEX!!!
In a deeply satisfying relationship the sex is almost always much, much better! Very few of us will argue with this benefit. Deep, fulfilling, lasting, emotional intimacy is the key to turning on
that sex drive. Go for it!
And so...
The knowledge is available. The help is available. The time and energy are almost always available somehow, as well. So, I encourage you to make yourself available to accomplish one of the most
rewarding and important aspects of your life. Go give your relationship everything it takes! You can do it!
Get More Details on Improving Your Relationships at
1. Forgive - If your partner is willingly and sincerely taking action, then you must forgive that person. Forgiveness is a two way street. And even if you are skeptical, you
still need to forgive the offense and forgive the person. Remember, forgiveness is a gift to YOU, as much, if not moreso, to the person being forgiven.
2. Communicate - Like most relationship issues, there is usually a “reason behing the reason.” Talk to them and let them know how you felt because of what happened. And try to
find out what was the reason behind their action. Do this in a non-accusatory way, without blame, and you have a much better opportunity to get to the heart of the matter.
Successful relationships require two people who are good at resolving problems. You had a problem that hurt your relationship. But if you
can really get to the heart of it, and really resolve the problem between the two of you, then you can kiss the problem goodbye and it won’t harm your relationship again in the future.
3. Acknowledge - If your partner is making progress in righting their wrong and reestablishing your trust, acknowledge it. Let them know you appreciate their effort and how much
it means to you. Little compliments and acknowledgements go a long way!
4. Be patient - The process of reestablishing trust lasts a long time. Be patient with your spouse. And be grateful for the progress they are making. Eventually you will come to
a place where you can see the change is sincere and the wrong has been righted.
5. Truly forgive - Why is this step here twice? Because many times we forgive the other person, but somewhere deep inside, we hold on to the hurt and we don’t forget what
happened.
Now, this is natural. It’s our own defense mechanism to protect us from getting hurt again.
And, of course, we will never forget what happened. But we have to truly forgive and let go of it.
Meaning, we have to forget about it as much as possible. If we don’t, this problem could rear it’s head in other ways. Therapist offices are filled with many people who have unknowingly hurt
their loved one in various ways because of the leftover hurt and bitterness of an unresolved offense many years prior.
** If you are religious, it helps to develop the habit of praying together every day, usually just before bed. It is pretty much impossible to stay mad at your loved one when you pray together
and it will bring you closer together.
I realize you may be apart from your loved one and some of this may not apply to you now. But I’m confident you will be together
again, and when that happens you’ll need to be able to know how to move forward without getting tripped up by issues of the past
It happens to the best of us. Communication is such a fickle thing, and the lines of communication can become blurred every so often, especially when feelings are involved. Even those who think
that they are immune to the confusion of conflict can find themselves drawn into a communication breakdown when they least expect it, and chaos ensues.
This happened to a friend on the weekend, and until to be quite honest, it took them by surprise. Even those of us who are better equipped than many others are not immune. A few cutting words
from a loved one, hurt feelings, and a defensive retort that left both with regrets. It was a silly argument, over something as simple as a misplaced bottle of soda, the lid off the juice, or
newspapers not picked up. But to them, it represented something much deeper that had been simmering away for a couple of weeks until the frustration reached breaking point.
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There was intense frustration at having to search for something when it is not where it was expected to be. Worse still when one person shifted it and the other didn't know the first place to
begin searching.
Searching for that particular shirt or needles and thread, lost car keys, a document missing from a drawer, missing covers for the outdoor chairs, all were examples of instances where the
house had to be turned upside-down. A moment's thought or a supportive reply when these things were discussed would have saved a lot of time and frustration. And the answer that was received?
"You need to open your eyes and organize yourself better"
This off-hand comment characterized the undercurrent of misunderstanding and lack of compassion that had been running through the relationship for quite some time. One partner did the majority of
the household chores and felt aggrieved that their efforts weren't recognized.
Praise or gratitude was not expected, but simple recognition was. Getting told that "I don’t expect you to tidy the house or cook my dinner every night" was interpreted by my friend as
ingratitude, and hurt her even more.
So where to from here? My friend's partner felt guilty at coming home every night to the perfect household, whereas she felt guilty if it wasn’t perfect. It was never about her trying to make him
feel guilty, but it seems it did. And this is where the communication fell down. He misinterpreted my friend's efforts, and she in turn misinterpreted his response.
Communication, communication, communication. My friend needed to be considered when things were not put back in their place. When two people live together it involves and adjustment in routines,
habits, and attitudes. Some consideration of her feelings needed to be taken into account in order for the relationship to move forward.
There was a need to voice frustrations before they get to boiling point. What was needed was a commitment to talking about feelings more often, and in such a way that both partners could do so
without judgment or consequence. Open communication was the key to their success, rather than suppressing feelings.
When people feel guilt or stress, it leads them to act funny ways. Often stress and guilt are barriers to communication. The key to overcoming them is to recognize what it is, and have the
courage to talk about it. You might be able to do it as a couple, or you might want the help of a friend who can listen to the way you are communicating with each other and offer insights and
advice.
They got it sorted out, and kissed and hugged. It wouldn’t hurt so much if you didn’t feel such love at the same time. But it serves as a good reminder to all. Sometimes you get so wrapped up in
your own emotions that you forget to think of the other person. You also need to entertain the possibility that you are misinterpreting each other. Talking about it is the way to expose the
miscommunication and let the healing begin.
A problem shared is a problem halved...
More useful Tips on Saving Marriage are located here :
The Top 7 Ways to Flirt with Women by James, host of "How To Be Irresistible To Women Mastery Series"
In my "How to Be Irresistible to Women: The Mastery Series" course, I talk with guys like Joseph Matthews about about the best ways to read female body language and recognize signals of
attraction. But the truth is, women are always looking from body signals from us GUYS, as well. If we make the right moves and send the right signals, then it doesn't matter how we look or how
much we make: our body communication will make women chemically and emotionally attracted to us! Body language, COUNTS.
This is how you start your interest. Nothing shows confidence off the bat like meeting a girl’s eyes, and KEEPING YOUR STARE. If you see her look down and smile, you know you’ve made it and the
time to approach is now. If she looks away from you but doesn’t smile, give her a shot nonetheless; just the fact that she met your eyes for a second or two shows interest.
2. The Dale Head Drop
So named after the guy who mastered the art of getting women rushing to his side, just with a simple shrug! If you really want to blow away a girl–and show some balls–meet a girl’s eyes, then
knowingly drop your head to the side, as if to say, "Hey, you know you want me. Come over here and get me!" I’ve found this to work incredibly well in foreign countries. In the States, the girls
tend to be able to see through it a bit more–but it still works!
3. Smile!
It’s often overlooked, but nothing communicates happiness, confidence, and interest in a girl all in one like a nice big smile. Show the girl you’re in control, show her you’re confident, show
her you’re a fun guy to be around: brighten the place up with a big smile! And if your teeth need work, then get them fixed! It’s good not just for your chances of meeting a girl, but also for
your health and appearance!
4. Open Body Language
So many guys walk or sit with their arms crossed, their legs close together, and their faces anxious and flat. Stop that! Welcome a girl into your world: Have your arms open and leaned back, your
legs open and relaxed, your face warm and inviting. You’ll not only attract yourself into a girl’s world, but also into the world of people at a party, club, or bar who can help you meet a future
girlfriend–or even wife!
5. Lean back her
As you’re talking to a girl, especially while seated, show her your interest with confidence by leaning away. This is the confident, assured posture of the alpha man, something dating expert,
Carlos Xuma, discusses in detail in my course. It forces her to lean into YOU, thereby putting you in the position of the chooser. It also communicates signals to her that she has to EARN your
respect--that you're not going to just give it away. And that drives her, WILD!
Of course, when things are going well and you're starting to develop a bond, you want to lean in. You don’t want to be a creep, of course, but you can generally tell by a girl’s body language and
tone of voice, how interested she is in you. If things are looking good, show her your control of the situation–and confidence in yourself–by leaning in and generally getting closer to her. This
communicates to her that you're ready to take things to the next level. If you've done your homework correctly, she'll be ready, too.
There's also so much space to answer this question, but there is one place that has ALL the answers:
My "How to Be Irresistible to Women: The Mastery Series" multimedia course!
There are over TEN different interviews with the masters of seduction, the top gurus in their field. From Joseph Matthews and Savoy, to Carlos Xuma and Zan, these guys cover EVERYTHING. From
conquering your insecurities and developing permanent self-belief, to mastering the art of the approach, even to generating sexual interest within minutes of meeting a woman: it's all in there.
So check it out now!
A Step-By-Step Guide To Meeting Women by Joseph
Matthews
You know, I love what I do.
I'm serious. I really, really LOVE what I do.
When I wrote my book, The Art Of Approaching, about a year ago, I had no idea how it was going to be received. After all, I was just some guy who figured out a few things and decided to share
them with the masses.
And when I started to get emails from guys who've bought my book THANKING me for helping them to meet the woman who eventually turned into their girlfriend or wife, it made me feel like my
journey from a guy who couldn't meet a woman if his life depended on it, to a man who can easily meet any woman he wants was worth it.
When I was starting out, I didn't have a Step-by-Step Guide to Meeting Women to help me out. I had to learn the HARD way.
I had to go out five nights a week to noisy and smoky bars and clubs, getting rejected by girls right and left until I was able to figure out how to talk to them.
I had to figure out how to overcome my crippling, paralyzing fear of rejection every time I saw a beautiful woman walking my way.
I had to learn to adjust my tactics after night-after-night of blowing it with a girl because I didn't know what to say to her!
I WISH I had a manual like The Art Of Approaching when I was first starting out.
That's why I envy you.
You don't have to go through the hard work that I did! It's already done for you! Now you can just go right for the gold without having to suffer through the depression and heartbreak that
usually goes along with struggling to meet women.
The Art Of Approaching is the only Step-By-Step guide out there that teaches you how to meet women.
Sure, there are other books that deal with "dating" and "seduction," but they never really focus on the most important step: HOW TO MEET THEM.
For 80% of the guys out there, meeting the kind of women they want and are attracted to -- and getting the women to feel attracted to them -- is the hardest part of the game!
That's why no one ever wants to tackle this subject! It's just simply too hard to talk about. It's much easier for others to just focus on what you need to say to a girl to get them on a date or
get them into bed.
But here's a simple little fact they're ignoring:
IF YOU CAN'T MEET A WOMAN, YOU CAN'T GET THEM TO DO ANYTHING WITH YOU!
Whether you're a guy who can't meet a woman for the life of him, or you're a guy who's okay at meeting women but doesn't know how to meet the type of woman you want to be with, you must know how
to take that first, all-important step towards getting the woman you want in life.
My book, The Art Of Approaching, covers everything you need to know to get the success you want.
In this book, you'll learn what signs to look for in a girl to KNOW, without a shadow of a doubt, that she's interested in you. Can you IMAGINE what it would be like to take all the guess work
out of meeting women? Think of all the success you'd have by just approaching the women you know are interested in you already!
You'll also learn how to flirt with a woman. Too many guys try to be manipulative and "trick" a girl into liking them. They beat around the bush, hoping to fly in under her radar, and then are
surprised when the woman they're going after REJECTS them! But if you know how to flirt, you can safely communicate your interest in a woman so that she knows EXACTLY what your intentions are
WITHOUT you having to sacrifice that all-important sexual tension.
I also give you field-tested and proven lines you can use to start a conversation with any woman, any where, at any time! You no longer have to worry about what you're going to say to a woman you
find attractive! You can just whip-out one of these ready-made lines and get her talking to you quickly and easily.
On top of that, you'll also learn how to tell captivating stories about your own life so she can learn all about you in a way that's fun and entertaining -- no matter how boring you may think
your life is.
You'll also get great tips on how to create and active social life where you'll have women around you all the time! Just think of how easy it will be to meet fantastic women when you have other
girls bringing them directly to you! I'll tell you exactly how to do this!
But probably the most important chapter in my book is the chapter on confidence. This is a subject I had to struggle with a great deal, and it took me a long, long, loooooooong time to figure it
out.
If you ask any woman what's the most attractive thing about the men she likes, 9 times out of 10, they will say "Confidence!"
But what does that mean? I never used to know, until I cracked the code! And when you figure it out, it is the most LIBERATING experience of your life!
Imagine walking through life, never worrying about what other people think of you, enjoying all the pleasures this universe has to offer without a bit of guilt, and displaying your own
personality and interests without editing yourself -- and having women attracted to that!
When you're confident, you don't have to change who you are to get women to like you! You actually get to SHOW them who you really are and have them fall in love with THAT.
You could be the ugliest man on the planet, but if you have confidence, women will FLOCK to you in droves, and they will all be attracted to you. You may think that's an outrageous statement to
make, but it's not! And I prove to you why confidence beats out looks every time in my book The Art Of Approaching.
If you want to start meeting the kind of women you dream of today, you owe it to yourself to get this amazing Step-by-Step guide that will show you EXACTLY what you need to do to achieve it,
without any of the heartbreak that comes with meeting women.
And it doesn't matter how old you are, what your nationality is, or how you look. It's possible for you you to enjoy incredible success in your love life right now. Just click below to find out
more about how to dramatically improve your ability to meet and attract the exact kind of woman you want tonight:
I offer a money-back guarantee on all purchases, so if you're not happy with the book or what I teach in it, you've risked nothing! Don't you owe it to yourself to at least check out this
Step-by-Step guide that could change your life?
The husband works long hours and the wife spends all of her time to meet the children's needs. So, the wife doesn't feel her husband's presence and the husband feels that his wife doesn't have
time for his needs anymore. Such scenario happens everytime. An unlikely scenario that, fortunately, can be fixed. There are ways to save a relationship as
such, here's how.
Ask yourself if your relationship is worth saving. Of course every relationship can be saved but it takes hardwork and both parties to decide that they want to save and make the relationship
work. If one partner has decided to end the relationship and doesn't want to get back together again, odds to saving the relationship can be spoiled.Couples decide to get back together
because of their children or because it is just convenient, which is not enough to save a relationship.
Identify the problems in your relationship. This can be very difficult to many. Many people do have tendencies to believe that the symptoms of the problem are the actual problem itself. For
example, lack of intimacy can be a problem to any relationships. And lack of intimacy leads to a straying partner. But seldom are those who can actually pinpoint what the real problem is,
resulting them to just fix the problem of a straying partner. So let's say that you've stopped the affair of your partner. What do you think happens next? It will definitely just lead to another
affair, because you've failed to deal with the core issues.
If you have identified the problem is, hearing both of your thoughts is the next step. Tell everything you want to say to your partner and don't hold back. Afterwards, listen to what your partner
has to say. It is suppose to be that way to successfully save the relationship. Reconnect to your partner by holding each others hand while you discuss about your problem. Bear in mind, that
anything the your partner talks about is meant to rebuild the relationship, not to hurt you.
Develop a plan of action to fix the problem. And this plan of action must come with a solid steps. You might want to schedule a date with your partner or
surprise your partner with creative ways to spend an evening together, a candlelight dinner on a rooftop perhaps. Or by simply committing a time to talk to her before you both go to
bed.
You must understand that once you commit to save your relationship, you are committing to the whole process of it. As you move forward, there will be moments of joy and there will also be moments
of sorrow.
If your relationship is worth saving, there is no reason whatsoever why you shouldn't put forth an effort to save your relationship.
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